Normal Friendly Test

This is basically a test for goths to determine how well you get along with normal people.

The rules are: Choose the one which best applies to you
  1. You are driving and see a bunch of people with suits and ties crossing the road. You have the right of way. Do you:
    1. Slow down and wave them on?
    2. Slow down and honk your horn or shout at them?
    3. Speed up?
    4. Kill them and eat their brains?
  2. You see a male wearing a football jersey. Do you:
    1. Stare disgustedly?
    2. Stare dotingly?
    3. Ask, "So what are you supposed to be, then?"
    4. Mutter "jock" just loud enuf for him to hear?
    5. Kill him and eat his brain?
  3. You see a male dressed in suit, loafers and a breficase standing alone on the corner of a busy intersection. The first thing that come thru your mind is:
    1. "He's probably waiting for a taxi."
    2. "If I walk near him he will probably yell for the police."
    3. "Nice tie. I wonder where he got it?"
    4. "Would anyone miss him, and where would I hide the body?"
  4. Fill in the blank. "Rush Limburgh is _________"
    1. A talk show host.
    2. A bloated nazi gas bag.
    3. God.
    4. A sad, misguided fool.
    5. Me.
  5. You are on a train and a group of foolball fans enter, fresh from a game, and sit nearby. Do you:
    1. Approach and strike up casual conversation?
    2. Nonchalantly move to the other end of the car?
    3. Run to the other end of the car and jump the gap to the next one?
    4. Hide behind the woman with the pram, read a newspaper, and pray they don't notice you.
  6. Fill in the blank. "All Saints is _________"
    1. A band.
    2. A group of whinging young tarts.
    3. The day after Halloween.
    4. "Didn't they do Bring on the Nublies?"
  7. You move into the suburbs and the your neighbours invite you over for tea and biscuits. Do you:
    1. Go over immediately
    2. Go over, but taking your sword cane "just in case"?
    3. Drag in the kids, lock the doors and windows and watch for a buring cross on your lawn?
    4. Kill them and eat their brains?
  8. You stopped watching Friends ...
    1. After the second series.
    2. When the TV license people took your set.
    3. After the first commerical break.
    4. When it started conflicting with Tenebrae.
  9. You're in a supermarket queue and some greasy train spotter-type approaches and asks you if you play Vampire: The Masquerade and would like to join his campaign. You think:
    1. "Why do I always attract these geeks?"
    2. "I'm bored, why not."
    3. "Would anyone miss him, and where would I hide the body?"
    4. "Foolish mortal."
  10. The children playing on your street always make you think of...
    1. The Famous Five.
    2. Sessame Street.
    3. Calling the police.
    4. Throwing bricks.
  11. You see a little girl playing with a Barbie doll. Do you:
    1. Explain to her the concepts of sexual oppression and gender roles?
    2. Egg her parents house?
    3. Smile and say "how cute"?
    4. Sit down with her and dress her dolls in black velvet and fishnets?
  12. The only time you wear bright colours is when ...
    1. You go to a funeral.
    2. You're doing laundry.
    3. You want to get a job.
    4. You're breathing.

Created by Bob
<Bob@darkwave.org.uk>