Describe Yourself to the Netscrape
The UPG 2001 Edition

The Physical:

Your name: Rich

Your online/nickname: =[catbush]=

Web page url: Umm...not yet.

Age: 29

Birthday: Conveniently placed on the school calendar to make me one of the elders of the year [and therefore highly respected...]

Gender: M

Location: Sheffield

Height/weight: 5'10", 11 of our English stones.

Current hair colour/style: Burgundy, Neck-length.

Natural hair colour: Not Burgundy.

Eye colour: Browny-brown.

Religion: Comedy.

Siblings: A brother, who is a misanthrope. I've decided to call him Gerald. He's in Wales.

Children: Probably not.

Relationship status: Bleedin' marvellous 6-years-and-rising relationship with Jozafeen. See - I told you there was one UPGer who knew me...

Occupation: Ooh, something IT-based.

Pets: None of my own, though I'm tempted to say my PC.

Computer you're on: Jozafeen's Duron750@1GHz overclocked and overcooled beauty [7 fans!]

Favourites:

Books: "Perfume", by Patrick Suskind, without a moment's hesitation. Pratchett [natchett]. Anything by Stephen Fry - especially his autobiography "Moab Is My Washpot". Bruges-tastic.

Movies: Hoo, tricky. Amadeus; Jacob's Ladder; Life Of Brian; The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover; Alien; Delicatessen; Grand Slam; This Is Spinal Tap...

Poems: John Hegley: Eddie don't like furniture / If you give him some for Christmas, he'll return it ya...

Television shows: Simpsons; Porridge; League Of Gentlemen; Robot Wars; Morecambe And Wise; Mary Whitehouse Experience; Comic Strip Presents...; Alexei Sayle; HIGNFY; Peter Kay's Phoenix Nights;

Songs: Is there a file size limit to Usenet posts? I'm not even going to try...although I'm listening to Alice Donut & Killdozer's version of "Age Of Aquarius/Let The Sunshine in" on an hourly basis ATM. And The Frank & Walters' "Happy Busman". Both happy tunes. Blimey.

Bands/musicians: Julian Cope, Alice Donut, Godflesh, Godspeed You Black Emperor!, The Cure, Foetus, Richie-era Manics, Squarepusher, Bethlehem, Ved Buenes Ende, King Diamond [hey, it's fun - and who else does concept albums these days, anyway?], Aphex Twin, Radiohead...and so on...

Club: Suppose it has to be Dissolution

Board games: Go!

Computer games: Counter-Strike, by a long way! Others: Dungeoon Keeper II, Civ2 [classic], Championship Manager, Interstate '76, Hardwar, Grand Prix Legends. Can't wait for Black & White...

Other games: None.

Magazines: Now that I have t'internet...

Places to visit: Anywhere where the sea is visible. Aw, you know what I mean. Don't get clever.

Food: Chocolate Ice-cream. Chicken Korma with Peshwari Naan. Anything Italian.

Colours: Additive ones.

Drinks: Hoegaarden, real ales. White Lightning. Ooh, alright, that's a fib. Like anyone's still reading by this point...probably pissed off with my over-use of "..."'s...

Miscellaneous Questions:

What other newsgroups do you read: alt.robotwars; lots of ahem alt.binaries.*

To which mailing lists are you subscribed: None.

How long have you been reading upg: Since 99?

What has been your favourite thread on upg: Not a thread as such, but the early Grave-posts-followed-by-Phildo-posts were highly amusing. And that one where the American car-owner got all het-up, and couldn't believe that no-one else shared his running-over-children-if-they're-stupid-enough-to-be-in-the-road opinions...

What are some of your hobbies: Counter-Strike. Building, then overclocking PCs.

What's the motto you adhere to: "If you don't compete, you can never lose."

What is your personal stupid human trick: I can place three stupid humans under my foreskin.

What do you want to be doing 10 years from now: Not thinking about what I'd like to do ten years from then.

What is the one thing/skill that you do not have now that you wished you possessed: An allergy to tobacco.

What do you think is your best asset: My sense of humour. Hey, I'm tryin' to be serious.

What do you think is the worst thing about you: The guilt. The neverending guilt. And I never finish anything important, 'cos I'm easily distracted. This is proof, if any were needed, or indeed asked for.

What do you value most in a friend: Their ability to make the troubles of the outside world disappear, even if it's only for a fleeting moment.

How do you picture upg: Inhabited by intelligent people who appear to be more hostile and opinionated than they actually are IRL. But that's Usenet all over, innit? Okay, apart from the intelligence ;o)

Do you have another question: Ask me again in ten minutes, and I'll have a humdinger of a question. Now, though...no. I'm that kind of person.