Describe Yourself to the Netscrape
The UPG 2001 Edition

The Physical:

Your name: Doktor Joy

Your online/nickname: Doktor Joy

Web page url: http://www.doktorjoy.org

Age: 30+

Birthday: Sagittarian

Gender: Male, sadly

Location: Slough/Heathrow

Height/weight: 5'11, 128lbs (9 stone 2lbs)

Current hair colour/style: Long & black

Natural hair colour: Unrewarding

Eye colour: Brown

Religion: You can be anything you want to be.

Siblings: Two brothers, poor fellows

Children: None that I know about (alimony suits please form an orderly queue)

Relationship status: If the females of this era could commit themselves to saying 'yes' or 'no', rather than playing silly guessing games, then I'd be able to answer this.

Occupations: Software Engineer, Retailer

Pets: 1 stupid cat

Computer you're on: G4/450 Powermac.

Favourites:

Books: LOTR, Snowcrash, Gothic Tales of Marquis de Sade, Clockwork Orange

Movies: Are in almost all cases a complete waste of time. Bladerunner is an exception. There are more, including the obvious one.

Poems: Not really

Television shows: Farscape

Songs: Kirlian Camera - Ascension, Covenant - Leviathan

Bands/musicians: This would be a waste of bandwidth to explore in full. Top 5 are, in no particular order: Alien Sex Fiend, Sisters, Nephilim, Bauhaus, Covenant

Club: Slimelight

Board games: Trivial Pursuits

Computer games: Unreal Tournament, Strikeforce, Tombraider Series, Alpha Centauri

Other games: Striker, Traveller, Rolemaster, AD&D

Magazines: Skin Two

Places to visit: Windsor, Lake District, Fort William, most of Wales

Food: Tea Cakes!

Colours: Black, White, Blue

Drinks: Tea (Peppermint, Earl Grey or Lady Grey). Schnapps occasionally.

Miscellaneous Questions:

What other newsgroups do you read: Lots

To which mailing lists are you subscribed: Lots

How long have you been reading upg: As long as it's been here. (7 years?)

What has been your favourite thread on upg: The "please can the world's obnoxious twats leave me alone" thread; because afterwards, they did.

What are some of your hobbies: Reading, Music, Gaming

What's the motto you adhere to: NOTHING is worth dying for.

What is your personal stupid human trick: Allowing myself to believe that the things I do actually matter; like someone cares.

What do you want to be doing 10 years from now: Travelling the world with a soul companion.

What is the one thing/skill that you do not have now that you wished you possessed: A soul companion

What do you think is your best asset: My legs. And, I'm not as big an arsehole as half the people I've met.

What do you think is the worst thing about you: My intolerance. I'm a bigger areshole than half the people I've met.

What do you value most in a friend: The ability to argue with me effectively

How do you picture upg: A tragic shade of what it was.

Do you have another question: Does anybody have a good reason for doing this questionnaire ;o)