Gothic Break-up Lines
These are presented as a perfect compliment to the gothic
pick-up lines. For when the nightcrawler you
picked up has begun to drive you crazy.
Many of these were used in real break-ups.
- "We need to have a serious chat..."
- "You make me too happy. Go away."
- "Dear baby, welcome to Dumpsville, population: You."
- "I'm getting really sick of you eating all my girlscout cookies."
- "You're not weird enough."
- "You have no more t-shirts I want to borrow."
- "Ummm... I just realised something about my sexuality"
- "Monogamy, what's that?"
- "Will you marry me?"
- "What? We're a couple?"
- "Hmmm.. I thought you'd be dead by now."
- "I much prefer coffee"
- "I've been feeling a bit strange lately."
- "My religion has this thing against having sex with corpses."
- "You just look better than me in my skirts."
- "I was hoping we could just go back to being enemies......."
- "Listen darling, I just wanted to fuck you not fucking marry you"
- "I'm really sorry, hon. But either we break up, or one of us dies."
- "I don't know how to explain it, but I think my cat's allergic to you."
- "It's just not going to work. You're human, and I'm not."
- "My mom thinks you're a dork."
- "My parents don't hate you as much as I hoped they would."
- "I got what I want. Now leave."
- "You know that straight girl I've been in love with for years...? Guess what?"
- "A friend of mine is really interested in me...."
- "I think it's time to break up the comic collection......"
- "You're just too nice. More like a friend than a lover."
- "I don't fancy you anymore. Go away."
- "Look, I'm just about sick of you, now wont you just fuck off!"
- "You're not evil enough for me to have a serious relationship with."
- "You have my permission to see other people if you want."
- "I can't date anyone who has never heard of George Carlin."
- "I can't go out with you because I actually like you."
- "I don't like obligations..."
- "Look, hon, being with you is like babysitting."
- "I can't see you anymore. I can't tell you why, but someday
you'll understand. Please, just leave me alone. I know from the bottom of
my black heart that I'm no good for you. I'm sure someday you'll find
your Alabama. I picture you coming back home in a few months and passing
me by on the street like you never knew me."
- "I know that breaking up will mean the the death of us both"
- "Would it upset you terribly if we were just . . .
FRIENDS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"
- "I'm sorry... this is all happening too fast... I mean, I've known you
for three days and its usually three weeks before
I would even kiss someone... Besides, I'm here in London and You'll
be in Bristol from tomorrow... It could never work... sorry... and
besides, I like you too much, as a friend, you know... sorry."
- "No, we're not going to break up."
- "You bore me."
- "I've gotten all I can out of you. Leave me."
- "You wore pink last Tuesday. Get out of my sight."
- "You're actually starting to cheer me up."
- "You don't like sex on gravestones?"
- "You used up all my hair spray."
- "You gave me live flowers, how tacky."
- "You want to do what? Bowling?!"
- "I think your an embarrassment to me and the rest of humankind, fucking
hippie!"
- "I have to have B.'s little dark-haired babies. You need to find
someone to have your little blond-haired babies."
- "Uh, sorry, I thought I liked you, but I've just realised you irritate
the living shit out of me. Sorry. Bye."
- "Listen luv, after last night I finally got my eyes tested."
- "By the way, we broke up. About two months ago. I forgot to tell you."
- "Well, let me put it this way. I live
in North Beach. You live in
The Haight."
- "I just get so bored after a while...."
- "I love you but I want to date 3 other people to be sure if this is
right for me."
- "I lied to you for the past 2 months."
- "Look, this isn't working. It hasn't worked so far and I don't
think it will, no matter how hard we work at it. I like you a lot,
you're a great friend, but I don't want to marry you, you're
suffocating me and I think we should call it quits."
- "You don't have any more clothes that I want to borrow."
- "I think we need to have a talk about you and I.... You are
aware that there is no You and I, right?"
- "I'm sorry, but you want a house in the suburbs, 2.5 kids, and a
golden retriever, and all I want is a really good corset and some cats."
- "Commitment?... Wait, hold on, what 'relationship'?"
- "No, you aren't really a vampire."
- "You want me to go to church with you? We need to talk."
- "It's not that i think you are becoming unattractive but....um... can you
look the other way when i am talking to you."
Compiled and
HTMLised by
Bob
<Bob@darkwave.org.uk>